The "hate" side for me comes from two different places. First of all, I, like a lot of other people, really struggle with change. New is sometimes scary. Actually, most of the time it is! Thinking about what lies ahead is overwhelming at times when we can't actually see what is around the corner. All of the "what-ifs" come flooding into my mind and I struggle to face the new year with encouragement and hope.
The other thing that trips me up around each new year, are resolutions. Every year we put ourselves through this practice of making a New Years resolution. What we will do in the coming year or what we won't do in the coming year. Usually they are based on some flaw that we see in ourselves and want to change.
We are overweight so we want to diet and exercise. We are tight on money, so we make a resolution to make and stick to a budget. Maybe we want to break a bad habit like smoking or emotional eating; maybe we want to create new "habits". Either way, our goal is to make changes in our lives to attempt to become a better version of ourselves.
From the outside looking in, that doesn't seem like such a bad thing. However, think about your resolutions over the years... how many have you followed through on all year long? Probably not many.
So, instead of becoming a "better human being", skinnier, less poor, neater, healthier, etc... we have put ourselves in a lose lose situation. Not only have we convinced ourselves that we are no good the way we are (and thus need a resolution to create a change) give it anywhere from a few days to a few months after the clock strikes midnight, and we will also be telling ourselves how weak and terrible we are because we couldn't see our resolution through.
Only the enemy of our soul, our joy and our peace would continue to perpetuate such a sadistic ritual even among those of us who claim this same enemy has no place in our lives.
Maybe that sounds a bit harsh... but it is the truth, at least as I see it. So, I guess that means no resolutions for me? Well, not in a traditional sense, but here is what I am thinking. No resolutions this year, instead, I need a fresh resolve.
There are things that I want to do that I know will make my life better: more regular prayer and quiet time, daily devotional reading, spending more time in the Word of God, journaling (which has been a resolution of mine many years, but I have never been good at following through)... but these things are not a reflection of what I think of myself. They are steps to a closer relationship with Jesus. If that is my end goal, that is all that matters. They journey may deviate from plans... maybe I miss a day of journaling or "quiet time". That doesn't make me a failure or a resolution breaker... It doesn't mean that I failed God and I just can't cut it in this Christian lifestyle. Come on, be honest... how often have you thought you just weren't good enough at your daily quiet time to measure up to those other saints who have perfected their walk with Jesus (I hope you heard the sarcastic tone in my voice as you read that)? What it does mean is that it is just another day, another step in the journey.
So, if I have to claim a resolution this year, it is this: To follow hard after Jesus, no matter what each day brings. There are tools and action items (to do's) that will help me to accomplish this, but if I make my "resolution" to accomplish xyz each day... read my Bible, Pray, journal, etc... then my goals become my God instead of my God leading me closer to Him (my goal).
My goal is to become closer to my God, not to check all the right things off my to do list. That, my friends, has done nothing for me in the past but create false hope and heartache. This year, I am going after true Hope and Healing!! No regrets and no condemnation!!
"There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit." - Romans 8:1
My resolution is to keep walking after the Spirit wherever and however that journey leads!! I will not reduce God to a New Years check list and I will not let my check list become my god.
#Goals
#HappyNewYear
#JourneyWithJesus
